This, my friends, is my secret weapon, my magic bullet that enables me rationalize not dusting for extended periods of time.
You know how icky the top of your refrigerator gets? No? Quick! Run and look right now. I'll wait.
Okay, so now you know what I'm talking about. What if I told you that you never have to clean it again? EV-er. Would you believe me?
I'm glad you're not that gullible. I believe me, so that tells you how gullible I am. But seriously, you will have to clean it one more time. Then when you get it squeaky clean, I want you to cover it with this GLAD Press 'n Seal whatever-it-is. Just lay it down, in a frustrating frenzy of sticks-to-everything purpose, so that it covers the entire surface of the top of your refrigerator. Then just sit back and watch the dust fall.
When it gets a good quarter inch layer of dust on it, peel it off and put a new layer on. You'll never have to dust again, just replace the plasticky magic.
I use the Press 'N Seal because it has magic bubbles that stick to the surface when you press down on it. It works great on the top of the refrigerator too.
For the tops of my cabinets, I lay down wax paper, one big long stretch of it from one end to the other, then I tape it down at the ends so it doesn't slide around. The wax paper is much more manageable to use, and I have a larger area to cover, so I use it instead of the more pricey Press 'N Seal.
Here's my old, dusty layer on top of my cabinets. I don't mind telling you that I get up here to replace this stuff once a year at most. It's not unheard of to go a year or two between replacing the wax paper.
It's not like my mother-in-law gets up here to make sure I'm keeping a clean house, you know.
Look, more dust. The biggest reason for lining the tops of my cabinets and fridge is the greasy dust that tends to accumulate in the kitchen. That stuff doesn't clean up with just a dust rag. It requires soap and elbow grease. I know you know what I'm talking about. It makes me gag.
I keep a couple fake sunflower garlands up top here as well. In order to dust them I just take them outside and blast them to kingdom come with Peanut Head's air compressor. It's extremely gratifying, watching all that dust being forcefully expelled from my life.
So, I'm thinking, do you think anyone would notice if I covered all the furniture with Press 'N Seal too? Or the kids? How cool would that be?