Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Christmas Cards? Check.


Early last month, we had our family pictures taken for the first time in seven years. I know. I can't believe it's been that long either.

It's just that I kept putting it off because, "Dang It, I'm still fat."

In the meantime gravity is also blessing me with her gifts and I have jowls as well.


For years I've been putting just the girls' pictures on our Christmas cards. Well not this year. With Zoe Bug going to turn twelve next summer, she'll be off to college next fall and that's it. She'll never come home again.


Therefore, I'm going to have a proper Christmas card this year, jowls be danged.

Stationery card
View the entire collection of cards.

Here it is. I just made it on Shutterfly, so it looks like I might actually get my Christmas cards out this year before Christmas. And not next August like that one time.

I usually design my own cards but this year I can't be bothered with that. I'm on vacation this week, and that would put a crimp in my sleeping in until 10:30 a.m. schedule.

No lie. I'm doing it.


My friend, GaeLyn, took these pictures. She has a real Big Girl Camera that I wouldn't have a clue how to use. She was so patient with us, and she took a lot of time getting oodles of poses.

Some of the poses were super uncomfortable too.


Like this one.

That's a pained smile you see there on my face.  My ample behind was perched on a pointy rock with a vertically tipped summit. I was holding my knees up while attempting to balance, all the while sliding down the summit.

It's not a good look.

Frankly, I'm just thankful I didn't fart. That's how tense I was.


Oh Stinkerbell. You know how when you're having a professional take pictures of your kids and you want them to cooperate and act like they really weren't raised by wolves, but all they can manage is their Constipation Face? Then you start whisper yelling through gritted teeth, "Relax and SMILE, or I will ground you when we get home."

And then they either don't believe you or they just don't care.

My kids just don't care.


Frankly, I'm just glad the whole ordeal is over with. Although I would have loved to have GaeLyn run some PhotoShop Magic on my frame, I didn't dare ask because I've learned the hard way that you have to be careful what you ask for.

When I had my picture taken for my ID Badge at school I jokingly asked the Badge Dude to clean up my extra chinnage before slapping it on my ID. He was a Mean Little Man, because I got my badge back and he clearly put my picture through the Fun House Mirror function and stretched my head out like a Gourd Gone Wild. Or Mrs. Peanut Head, take your pick.

28 comments:

  1. Your family picture is beautiful and I LOVE your shirt! Too cute. Also, I'm surprised you convinced Stinkerbell to wear such a girly outfit. =]

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    1. Thank you, Natalie. I bribed her. It's now her go to outfit as an alternative to a dress.

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  2. I think those are great pictures and you look beautiful.

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  3. Your christmas photos look fantastic and you look lovely!

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  4. Love the pics and your blog! You are hilarious. Happy holidays!

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  5. LOL, Jill! For all the discomfort in posing, your pictures turned out great. I'll be trying for a family picture today while my son is here for Thanksgiving.

    Happy Thanksgiving!

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    1. Thank you, Kathy. I hope your pictures worked out. I know it was forever ago.

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  6. I think the photos are all gorgeous with such beautiful settings and I love the card! :)

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  7. You guys look terrific-good for you for getting it done!

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    1. Thank you, Jennifer. No sense putting it off any longer, I guess.

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  8. Those are great pictures. You have a beautiful family!

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  9. Your family picture is beautiful and I LOVE your shirt!

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  10. Absolutely beautiful family pictures!

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    1. Thank you, Tiffany. I've missed seeing you on your blog. I hope you are well and resting up for the school year.

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  11. I love your pictures! And I know exactly what you mean... my kids can't be still or smile when there is a photographer around!

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  12. OH My Word!!! You had me laughing from the beginning. But I can so relate! Especially with the extra "fluff". My mom used to tell me, She's not fat she's fluffy! This is my first visit here. I'll be coming back. I so need the laughs!

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    1. I use that line all the time. Ever since the movie "Ice Age" and Queen Latifah as the Wooly Mammoth said it. It's perfect.

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